Howzit brothers!
Today I want to talk about something that I am facing and want to share it with you. I have been a Professional Architect for just over 25 years and recently decided to make the biggest life change ever! I have decided to resign from my current office and relocate down to Cape Town to search for a better life, not only for me, but my wife and kids too. The magnitude of this decision, I can assure you, was not taken lightly. I not only had to make the decision for me but also for those that I love.
I am sharing this topic with you as it relates to how we as men need to ensure that we are emotionally mature to make important life and career choices.
Men, as I have mentioned before, largely lack the ability to fully understand their emotions and the consequences that come from this. If men are lacking the sensitive connection with themselves they will always struggle to make true meaningful decisions for themselves. Men are seen as the physical strength within a family but they MUST also have a strongly developed emotional maturity. They are not only expected to physically defend their families but also need to make very key important decisions that will ultimately have a big effect on them…mostly without being aware of this.
Again, I go back to why men need to be emotionally mature and FULLY connected to their emotions. Ideally they need to have a complete understanding of who they are emotionally and have a mature relationship with themselves before entering any intimate relationships.
For me to make the decision to relocate I had to realise the responsibility I had to make the right one for my family. My family also needed to have full confidence in me to do this.
Men, we need to change the perception that we are immature and irresponsible and start taking back our rightful position as fully emotionally driven men! We all have the ability to dig deep within us and connect with our emotions. They are literally fighting for you to release them and join with the powerful physical aspect that you possess!
Another very important item based on my life changing decision is the ability to question your life path and the journey it will take.
We all grow up watching our parents work hard until 65 and then retire, but is this right?
Following the Covid19 Pandemic I personally had the worst nightmare as I’m sure everyone else did too! BUT it was also the best time of my life?! I know this sounds strange but the pandemic forced all of us to rethink our lives…we had to evaluate what we value the most and what we don’t. What we need to change and is this how we want to continue living?
These are heavy questions which, combined with the threat of dying from an unknown virus, was a lot to take on board.
I started to question many things in my life…my job and career as an architect, the amount of time spent at the office versus time spent with my family. The Covid lockdown forced us together and strangely took away the issues of money and work, if only for a short period of time.
I personally started to see just how my life was not where it should be. I absolutely loved working from home, close to my wife and kids. We bonded more than ever and spent many special times together learning to get to know each other again!
My kids got to see me more and actually see what dad does all day at the office. I didn’t have to suffer through the traffic two hours each day and put these hours to good use by going on regular daily walks.
This is where I realised how important walking and spending quiet time every day was so important. Moments of solitude are integral to the development of an emotionally strong person. I will go into this topic in more detail in the weeks to come.
I also realised how badly we as architects are treated as an industry and realised that we would all have to learn to work differently with more flexibility – also another topic for more discussion.
In summary, please remember that your emotional strength and maturity is needed to guide and care for yourself and your loved ones. Never underestimate how we as men have the ability to grow emotionally and achieve a higher level of understanding that we can connect with our loved ones and the world around us.
Never be scared to re-evaluate your life. It is your responsibility to challenge things that don’t work for you. Challenge how it makes you fell.
We need to create the life that we want, that we deserve! Don’t accept less….and don’t be AVERAGE.
Later
Joe. Blogs
